Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Tim and Tina

Once apon a time, before the advent of texting and Facebook, men actually contacted women for dates via the phone. It's true. Ask your parents.

This was a good thing. A man would actually have to make the effort to approach a woman and start up a conversation. These conversations usually started with an inquiry as to the woman's name and marital status. Let me create a typical conversation for you:

A man approaches a woman. "Hi. My name is Tim. What's yours?"

The woman would bat her eyelashes and smile. "I'm Tina. How are you?"

Tim takes a step forward. "I'm doing good. You have a beautiful smile. Can I have your number? I'd love to take you out sometime."

Of course Tina says yes. They go out. They fall in love. They get married. They buy a house. They have babies. Tina gains 35 lbs of pregnancy weight. Tim begins to drink one too many beers at night. They go from having sex three times a week to three times every sex months. Tim has an affair. Tina moves in with her mother.

Couldn't be simplier.

These days that scenerio would be played out quite differently. Men no longer approach women in the supermarket, bookstore, or any other place that grown folks may go. I have had men that I barely know contact me through the almighty Facebook to ask me out. My reply: "And who are you?"

Now, let's take the above example and apply it to today's hightech world.

First, Tim is trolling online. He is on Steven's Facebook page. He sees a post from Tina and thinks she looks cute. He pokes her.

Tina pokes back.

Tim requests Tina as a friend. Tina accepts.

Hi Tina! Hope your day is going good! Tina thinks this post fromm Tim is sweet. She replies with, It's going good. How are you?

Tina and Tim exchange these type of posts for a day or two.

Finally Tim catches Tina on Facebook instant messenger.



U busy?

Nah. Sup?

Wanna go out Friday night?

Um, sure. Here's my number. Text me.

Tim texts Tina. They go to a movie and end up back at Tina's house. They spend the night together. Tina is fairly certain that Tim is the one she should settle for. Tim, on the other hand, promises to text later on that day. But, Tim gets busy and never texts her again. Tina ends up a bitter, man-hating single woman. She begins to collect cats. As Tina grows older, the neighborhood kids begin to fear her. Tim becomes an alcoholic and dies from liver failure at the age of 50.

Trust me. It's much better to accept a date the old fashion way. At least you get babies out of it.

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